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While the holidays are my favorite time of year, sometimes they can be a bit stressful. As the winter wears on, you maybe looking for a bit of relief. Â With that in mind, here is a compilation of some of the funny things my ESL students have said to me over the years. Hopefully it will bring you a good laugh. Enjoy!
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Student: Miss, I wasn’t borned here.
Teacher: That’s ok. Not everyone was born in New York.
Student: I wasn’t borned here. I was borned in New Jersey.
Teacher: Ok. New Jersey is a nice place.
Student: Wait. No. I was borned in a doctor.
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Student:(looks at inflatable snowman lawn decoration) Is that real snow?
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Student: Miss, I really love going to the beach(said with an accent which made beach sound like what you call a female dog).
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Student: I know the answer to that question.
Teacher: Great! What do you think it is?
Student: I don’t feel like telling you.
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Student: You’re not going to be here tomorrow?! Why not?
Teacher: It’s Saturday.
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Student writing a sentence using the word scarce: The shoes in my closet are really scarce.
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Student: How come you don’t have any children?
Student after learning about the Pilgrims: What do you mean they didn’t have bathrooms?! Where did they do their business? That’s gross.
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After seeing a picture of a black cat: No! Bad luck! (while shielding eyes).
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Student: You have parents? Really?
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Student: What are you doing this summer?
Teacher: I’m going to Italy.
Student: No!! You can’t go!!
Teacher: Why not?
Student: We need you here! You can’t leave us!
Teacher: I’ll be back in time for school in September. You’re graduating anyway. You won’t have me next year.
Student: But I want to visit you.
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Student: What’s wrong with your eyes?
Teacher: What?
Student: They look funny. They’re not brown.
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Student: Why your eyes blue? You color with crayon?
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Teacher: It’s Yankees with a yuh sound.
Student: I’ll say it the English way if you say it the Spanish way first.
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Student: How do you have a black cat? Don’t you have bad luck all the time?
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Student: The other day my bruddah…
Teacher: Your bruddah? Was your muddah there too?
Student: Hahahah you sound funny!
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Student walking into my steaming hot classroom: It’s like global warming in here!
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