Mixing Teaching and Marriage

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courtesy theguardian.com

Love and Marriage is a common topic, but what about Teaching and Marriage?

There are many, many things college does not prepare you for when you enter the field of education. One of them is how to balance your personal life with your professional life. Teaching is an all-consuming career and it demands more and more if you let it. One of the most difficult things about a career in education is not the classroom, it is finding a balance between your career and time for your partner.

If you are not married to a teacher or someone in education, there are days when your partner does not understand. It even seems like he or she does not want to understand. Your partner does not grasp why you cannot leave work at home, why you cannot finish grading those essays during your prep period, or why you are crying over a student. She can be irritated with the amount of time you spend after school (coaching, volunteering, chaperoning, etc). He sees how much you give to your job and students, and how you are so exhausted there is very little left for him and he is frustrated.

Here are some ways to balance your personal life and your career:

1. Schedule. Dedicate blocks of time for your spouse and family. Sitting in the living room grading papers while everyone is playing monopoly does not count as quality time. Promise that between the hours of four and six, you will not pick up an essay or answer an email. Ensure that Saturdays are family days and leave the bag of papers in the trunk of the car. It is hard because as an English teacher I have stacks of essays and a little fairy does not grade them for me, but I know the students can wait an extra day for their essays if it means quality time with my family.

2. Include your spouse. Invite your spouse to school events. Cheer together at football games and chaperone dances. By including them in your career, they will see how important your job really is and how much it not only means to you, but to your students as well. Until they see you in your element, they will not understand why your career is so important to you. And if they do not want to come, you can have the peace of mind that you at least tried.

3. Say no. Sometimes it can all be too much. Children are demanding, it is part of their nature. They want attention and sometimes there isn’t enough of you. You cannot make every one of their basketball games, but they will still love you. Only stay after school three days instead of five for tutoring, they will be okay. I know what you are thinking, “But no one else will…” yes they will and can. Let others take on responsibilities. If you are reading this, I know you are juggling several different aspects of teaching because you CARE. It is the summer and you are reading articles about education. Only great teachers do that. You want better for your students and you want to help them. If you take on too much, there is nothing left for you or your family and that is not what teaching is all about.

At the end of the day, you have to remember, yes, our students love us and you love them, but when they go home chances are they are not thinking about you. They will not be the ones taking care of you and being by your side in ten years. Your spouse will. Our jobs are important, but our family and partners are more important because they are your support system.

Without a support system, you could not be the fabulous teacher you are today. Take care of that support system.[/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]