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RespectYes, I totally get teenagers. Although they are not my favorite group to teach, I do understand what is going on in those bodies of theirs. I have two teens of my own, and one adult child, so for those of you who are just beginning the ‘tween’ journey into this rite of passage, many blessings, lots of Kleenex and remember that this too shall pass. Then you get to deal with an entirely new set of challenges with adult children. Sigh.

I want to revisit a pre-Thanksgiving federal activity that had many people up in arms: Malia and Sasha’s response to the tax-payer funded annual pardoning of the turkey.

But let’s hit it from a different perspective than that of two teenage girls doing what teenage girls do. Let’s approach it from the point of one of the most crucial life principles everyone should learn from a young age: RESPECT.

This is my one ‘rule’ in my classroom. I don’t make a huge list of rules for my students. I have expectations. Rules are so legalistic in the sense that children aren’t allowed to make choices, even poor choices, in which to learn and grow. Expectations on the other hand allow children to ponder what I would like to see happen in our community classroom and weigh outcomes. But respect is my one rule.

Because everything hinges on that one life principle.

The way kids leave supplies on the floor doesn’t respect others’ safety.

The way a student will interrupt during a discussion doesn’t respect the conversation that has already begun.

The way a child chooses to dress tastefully shows that he or she respects his or her own body.

The way a child chooses to use proper language around others shows that he or she respects the ears of his or her listeners.

The way a student will open the door for another puts the other student first.

The way a student will patiently wait his or her turn to speak with me while I’m engaged in a conversation with an adult shows that the student understands the importance of what is being talked about.

The way a student will use manners after sneezing, coughing or making those lovely bodily noises shows that he respects those around him.

The way I patiently listen to each side of a conflict shows the students that I truly care about and respect them both and want to help them reach a resolution.

The way I treat my students as little people shows them that I respect them as the individuals they are.

Respect.

Now let’s revisit Malia and Sasha. I totally get that the grand pardoning of the Thanksgiving turkey is silly and boring, albeit to them. But we need to remember that this is a national tradition, just like the traditions that surround them on a daily basis. No matter how goofy or how stupid they may think this annual event is, simple respect, in posture and attitude, goes a long way: respect of their position as first daughters, respect of their parents as parents in general and definitely respect of the nation that their family has been serving for almost two terms. We all have to do things at one time or another that we don’t like to do. It serves everyone best when we throw back our shoulders, put smiles on our faces and at least try to enjoy whatever it is we are doing, even if it is something that doesn’t rank high on our playlist of life.

The longer I teach, the more I see this critical skill disappearing. And when our little people and teenagers grow up without respect, they develop into disrespectful adults. And we all know what it’s like to work with that population.

How do you foster respect in your classroom?

Paula has a Masters degree in education with an emphasis on child development and child behavior....

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